Disney World Trip Report Day #2 (Part 1) – Where Princesses Are All Up on the Book of Faces

Our first “real” Disney day was a Tuesday, and what a Tuesday it was.  Back to the Magic Kingdom for the first time in 15+ years…I was probably going to cry a lot.  And I did.  It started on the bus.  Yeah…that girl.  And it wasn’t just from waking up at ass o’clock in the morning to get to our 8:15 Cinderella’s Royal Table reservation, either.  That was a rough one.  I’m pretty sure it was still dark outside when we rolled out of Pop Century…which I didn’t take any pictures of.  Oh well.  It had a lot of giant props and served its purpose as a place to sleep.

Julie and I had a tear-filled bus ride over to Magic Kingdom (I think the toddlers were looking at me funny, but sit down, kiddies, I paid for this shit, I can cry if I want to), and when we got there, we found our Magic Bands were in working order.  Thank god the only snafu we had was at the Magical Express.  Once we were inside the park, we started taking pictures of ourselves, which would pretty much be the theme of the entire vacation.  Hellooooo 800 Photopass pictures.  We hadn’t gotten to pick up our plus card yet, so a nice cast member took about ten photos of us with both our cameras and his camera in front of the train station.  We got those added to our Magic Bands, and off we went to experience the park pre-opening…where we took another 40 pictures.  We made it our mission to stop every time we saw a Photopass photographer.  I do not regret this decision.

I think we were slightly late when we went to check in for our breakfast, but it didn’t matter, as we had to wait in a line anyway to take our picture with Cinderella.  It was here that I learned the importance of the “princess pose” and that we would have to do variations of it each time we took shots with a girl in a dress.  Good thing I learned this four seconds into the trip.  While we waited to go upstairs for breakfast, I decided it would be a fantastic idea to take pictures of random castle things, a skill which I have perfected thanks to years of training at Ren Faires and Medieval Times.




We finally took our picture with the woman of the hour, and then we were escorted upstairs where I proceeded to take pictures of the ceiling.


It’s really pretty inside the castle, but let me tell you, the food is subpar.  I don’t eat eggs, and Disney is like…egg-a-palooza at breakfast, so there was pretty much nothing to eat that didn’t have eggs somewhere.  I ended up getting the steak (and eggs), and, while it was okay, it certainly wasn’t worth the $60 per person price, as this was the one meal we paid out of pocket.  However, the staff was great.  Our server was so nice, seeing as we were two adults having breakfast with a bunch of princesses, she didn’t think we were ridiculous or anything.  In fact, she saw my first visit button and gave me an autograph book because it was the first day of our trip and I didn’t have one.  She even tracked down Snow White (who had come to our table first when I didn’t have the book) to get her to sign it.  SO nice.  I love Disney cast members.  We had one of the best character interactions here right off the bat with Princess Aurora.  I think she gets the shaft a lot, honestly.  Maleficent clearly steals the show in Sleeping Beauty, and I can’t remember anything about Aurora in the movie that really makes her stand out.  But this girl was a riot.  I think she talked to us for at least five minutes about princes and how far we traveled on horseback, and then when we were taking pictures, she asked, “Are you going to post these on the book of faces?”  I about LOST it, I was laughing so hard.  Then we had a conversation about this magical, magical book.  Every other Princess Aurora paled in comparison to this one.

tripreport-014Book of Faces Aurora, we love you.

It took about an hour to get through breakfast, and once we were done, the park was already open to the public.  We had a Space Mountain fast pass + to use before 10am (mistake, do not book your fast pass pluses until afternoon, as there is NOBODY there in the morning), but we decided to screw around for a bit first.  We headed off to Tomorrow Land, though, and my very first Disney World ride became…Buzz Lightyear.  I’m a big fan of rides that are games, and we rode it twice in a row with no wait, stopping to get our photo numbers each time so we could add them to the plus card.  Thankfully, Julie knew where the camera was.  We’re so pimp like that.  After our trip into space, we decided to cash in our fast passes, but I believe we found a random Stitch out meeting people first.  There was barely a line, and let me tell you, Stitch is TINY and NUTS.  I was practically sitting on the ground to take a picture with him, and he stuck his fingers in our ears, it was just ridiculous…ridiculously awesome.

My first ride on Space Mountain was…well.  I was terrified.  I have no idea why, as the ride isn’t really that scary, but by the time I got off, I felt like I needed a cigarette.  It didn’t help that my shoe got stuck in the damned car, so I was praying my leg didn’t separate from my body as I tried to get the hell out of there.  We picked up our photos, and then I needed like…a break.  I know, it was 10am, and I was practically dead.  So, we made our way to pick up our Photopass+ card, and headed towards (New) Fantasyland where I teared up at pretty much everything.  I believe we went on Winnie the Pooh (which was the longest ten minute wait of my life because that ride smells like children…I have no other way to describe it), and the Teacups, where I missed my first opportunity to eat that cupcake that comes in a cup that’s mostly frosting.  Spoiler: I talked about it the entire trip, and then I never got one.  I still mourn the loss of my cupcake cup.  Eventually, we made our way over to use our Enchanted Tales with Belle fast pass pluses, and I was pretty upset that we missed half the cottage, which was a huge selling point for me.  Seriously, when I was a kid and at Disney, the thing I remember the most was walking through Mickey Mouse’s house and looking at all the little details, and now that we couldn’t walk through Belle’s I was like…the hell?  However, getting into the experience with no wait was pretty fantastic, and Maurice’s work room…holy crap, the magic.  If I didn’t have a goal in mind, I would have cried through the whole thing.  But, being the attention whore I am, I had to get in the show.  Let’s be real, it took all of three seconds for the cast member to pick me to be the wardrobe.  YES.  My music degree had finally paid off.

tripreport-015She told me I sang better than the real wardrobe.  Damn straight.

The experience was adorable, although more for little kids and their parents than adults.  Julie got to play Fifi the feather duster, aka Lumiere’s Girlfriend.  Ooh la la.  We all got our pictures with Belle and then special photopass cards and a bookmark.  Treasured.  Then we tried to ride the Little Mermaid and got denied, as it was down.  I guess that was okay, because I spied my boyfriend off in the distance, and had to get close to him.  Oh yeah.  You know who I’m talking about, don’t you?  You should if you have read any of my Dumb Things Boys Do at the Bar posts.

tripreport-016Oh yeah.  You know how I like ’em cocky.

Gaston, despite his shoulder pads, was GREAT.  He was spot the fuck on, drawn eyebrows and all.  I mean, we threw semi-dirty pickup lines at him like it was nothing and he shot back immediately.  I wish our date could have lasted a little longer, but, I mean, he’s a popular man.  I had to have a threeway with him and Julie and there were throngs of women all around him just waiting to have a go.  We’d meet up again later, though, don’t worry, and I got to sit in his giant chair when I had withdrawals, so it was all good.  Sidenote: Lefou’s Brew…not all that great.  I’m glad I got my souvenir plastic fake beer stein, but I definitely don’t have to drink that crap again, though it got better the more you drank it.  Maybe it was real beer after all.  Hmm…

And I will leave it here for now.  Don’t be sad, more New Fantasyland adventures await, along with a Pirates League makeover and that time karma hit me in the face for scaring little children when something else scared the living crap out of me.  Buahahaha.


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